I find myself in the midst of the very situation that I’ve been dreading for the last few months-planning Cameron’s first birthday party. It’s not the actual party planning I dread. I dread having my precious little baby turn one years old. Although I am excited about celebrating this milestone, it makes me sad that Cameron is almost 1. It’s beginning to sink in that time flies even quicker the second time around.I don’t know if he’ll be my last baby, but just in case, I’m making it a point to soak up every second I spend with this little guy, but it still feels like it’s not enough. Times like these make me wish I had a video camera recording every moment of our lives so I could relive all these precious moments whenever I want. As I am planning Cameron’s first birthday party, I find myself reminiscing about the past year. I’ve compiled a list of the top 10 things that I will miss about baby Cameron.
1. Cradling a sleeping baby
Oh how I love this moment. I can spend hours holding baby while studying his peaceful face, watching him breath and wondering what he is dreaming about. Also marveling at how light and delicate baby feels. Now when Cameron falls asleep in my arms, I can only hold him for a few moments before my arms need a break. It’s funny how you forget how small a baby is until you actually hold a tiny, little newborn.
2. Baby Feet
One of my favorite things about babies are their tiny, little feet and their tinier, littler toes. I especially love how they fit into the palm of my hand. I can’t resist the special scent of these tiny little things-sweaty and sour all at the same time. Yummy! Baby loves it too since he’s always nibbling on his toesies every chance he gets.
3. Toothless Grin
That gummy smile paired with that high-pitched squeal. To. Die. For.
4. Baby Hair
I love running my fingers through Cameron’s baby soft, spikey hair. It’s so downy soft that you can barely feel strands of hair.
5. Baby Babble
Hearing a babbling baby speak gibberish is one of the funniest things ever. Cameron is very vocal and always wants to be a part of the conversation by making his presence and opinions known. Even though he doesn’t make any sense, it’s still so fun to listen to him squeak, squeal and squawk.
6. Baby’s Firsts
I love celebrating all of Cameron’s firsts. First smile, first laugh, first time rolling over, first time sitting up, etc. It’s always so exciting to witness Cameron doing something for the very first time. I know he’ll have more firsts, but there’s something so innocent about first firsts that make them waaaay more precious than anything else.
7. Drunk Baby
This never fails to make me laugh. The stage where baby‘s muscles are as strong as a strand of hair, where baby’s neck flips and flops about. Where his core muscles haven’t strengthened enough to keep him in an upright position and he keeps tipping over no matter how many pillows I prop around him. Or how wobbly baby gets when he learns to stand and tries out his walking legs for the very first time. My favorite part of all this is shouting, “Timber!” every time he starts leaning too much to one side.
8. Baby Gadgets
It’s always so fun watching baby jump, jump, jump in the jumper, or bounce, bounce, bounce in the bouncer. Baby swings, co-sleepers, activity jumpers, all lifesavers and great mommy helpers, but baby outgrows these things at rapid speed. I wish I could still distract him with these things, but he has his eyes set on life outside the playpen gates.
9. Milk Wasted Baby
Who could resist the freshly fed, comatose, smirking baby? The same baby who moments earlier was crying bloody murder at the top of his lungs. Yes, that same baby whose face turned red with anger and started gagging on his own retching screams. It’s a miracle how all tears and screams instantaneously cease the second baby gets his milk!
10. My Baby
I hate to say it. But it’s true. Once he turns one, he’s technically not a baby anymore. Cameron will officially be a toddler. This hurts me the most. It’s definitely leaving a sweet, bitter sting in my heart. Ouch! I feel like I just had a baby, now I am about to have two toddlers. I’m not ready to let my baby grow, but Cameron is ready to become a big boy just like his big brother. There’s no stopping this guy. He’s determined to explore the world.
So for the next month or so before your first birthday, I promise to love on you even more with head-to-toe rapid fire kisses, numerous visits with the Tickle Monster, and marathon snuggle sessions. No matter your age, in months or years, forever my baby you will always be. I’m thrilled for all the new milestones coming your way. Just as excited as I am to learn all the lessons you will unknowingly teach me. Cheers to you my happy baby. Cheers to another day, another phase. Here we go, BubBub. Together we grow.
In the wake of Robin Williams untimely and shocking departure, the spotlight on suicide has once again taken center stage. In support of National Suicide Prevention Week September 7-September12, 2014, and International Suicide Prevention Day on September 10, 2014, if you or someone you know is experiencing severe depression or exhibiting suicidal tendencies, please call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at 1-800-273-TALK (8255) to speak with a trained counselor. Counselors are on hand 24/7 to offer support or advice for anyone who is going through a personal crisis. Anyone who is experiencing relationship problems, financial problems, family problems, substance abuse, etc., is encouraged to call the Lifeline, even if you are not having suicidal thoughts.
Those having suicidal thoughts often feel isolated, alone, hopeless, helpless and misunderstood. These thoughts can lead to troubling behavior such as, verbalizing the desire to die or to kill oneself, researching ways to commit suicide, expressing feelings of not having the will or reasons to live, reckless behavior, and extreme mood swings. If you recognize any of these behaviors in yourself or a loved one, call the Lifeline because these are red flags for suicidal behavior.
Suicide is extremely dark and lonely. Talking to a third-party person who has no personal knowledge or judgment of your situation can be the difference in a life and death situation. Although you may feel alone, you are not.
The late, great Charlie Chaplin reminds us to “Smile, though your heart is aching. Smile, even tough it’s breaking…light up your face with gladness, hide every trace of sadness. Although a tear may be ever so near, that’s the time you must keep on trying. Smile, what’s the use of crying. You’ll find that life is still worthwhile-if you just smile.”
To learn more, please visit www.suicidepreventionlifeline.org